


Wish You Were Here

by transkakyoin



Series: Danganronpa Fic Collection [1]
Category: Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Angst, Culprit!Taka, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Execution, Faked Suicide, Happy Ending?, Ishimaru Kiyotaka as Ishida | Kiyondo, Kiyondo/Ishida is an alter, Kiyotaka Snaps, M/M, Minor Ishimaru Kiyotaka/Owada Mondo, Poisoning, Sad Kiyotaka
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-18
Updated: 2019-09-29
Packaged: 2020-09-06 13:42:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20292406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/transkakyoin/pseuds/transkakyoin
Summary: What if Kiyotaka snapped after Mondo died, and, rather than being a victim, became a culprit?(I got this concept from dangan.heaven on Instagram!)





	1. Kiyotaka's Life of Despair

Kiyotaka Ishimaru could never really say that he was stable. Ever since he was young, his whole life was rocky. His grandfather had left the family with debt and shame that was near nationwide. Of what he could remember of his childhood, he spent it alone. He isolated himself from everyone, even occasionally from his family, so they all couldn't isolate him on their own will. He pushed himself just about as far as he could, determined to restore his family's honour despite how impossible of a task that would be. He dedicated his entire life to being a perfect student, sacrificing any sort of a social life or attempt at hobbies for his studies. That's what got him into Hope's Peak, and that's what gave him his reputation for, as Mondo so kindly put it, "Having a major stick up his ass."

God, Mondo... When Kiyotaka was with Mondo, he was at the happiest he had been in all of his life. They'd started off on the wrong foot, certainly, but Mondo was the first and closest friend he'd ever had. Despite Mondo's chaotic nature, Kiyotaka cared for him greatly. And despite their situation, they were happy when they had each other.  
Then everything came crashing down, just like it always did.

Because of the wretched killing game, Kiyotaka's "bro" had been ripped away from him. The heavy pressure of Monokuma's threats had pushed him, and he killed. There was nothing Kiyotaka could do to stop the inevitable. He tried to vote for himself instead of Mondo, he pleaded with the others, he did everything he could. His attempts were in vain, though, and he was still pushed along by his classmates to watch his only friend be brutally executed.  
He had been hoping that, if he worked hard enough, he could fix himself and the damage his grandfather had done. But after Mondo was taken from him, he was shattered. There was no repairing him.

Kiyotaka spent a good while sobbing. He'd never cried so hard in front of others, though there were rarely others for him to cry around. He could tell that the others didn't really care how he was feeling, that some were even annoyed by his agony over the death of his closest companion. He took a break from his pain to explore, then retreated to his bedroom to be alone with his thoughts and the feelings that he'd never felt so strongly before.  
He could tell he was on a downward spiral, but it was like he was watching himself from the opposite side of a pane of glass. He could see everything going downhill, but he could do nothing to prevent it.

He laid in bed, in and out of awareness. There was a voice in his mind that felt close and far all at once, and he didn’t like the familiarity of the feeling. It seemed like most of the memories that he could only vaguely remember from his youth carried the same feeling, and it made him feel even more out of it than he already was.  
Something was wrong within Kiyotaka’s head. He was sure of it, and he had been sure of it for a long time. His father never had the money to get him diagnosed, though. Even if he had been, however, that couldn’t have prevented the inevitable. It couldn’t have kept him from getting worse.  
Mondo’s death made him feel like he’d lost a part of himself. And, in a way, he had. Even though that part of him hadn’t shown itself yet completely, Kiyotaka was aware of it. And he was just about ready to give that part of him full control.


	2. A Steady Descent into Madness

The part of Kiyotaka that was severed from him after Mondo passed wasn’t exactly a positive part of him.  
He embodied the negativity that Taka felt; the heartache, sorrow, fear, rage.... Every ounce of pent up emotion was channeled into this one being who played the role of backseat driver in the troubled man’s mind.

Kiyotaka had given him the name Kiyondo Ishida.  
Sure, Kiyondo wasn’t exactly a good side of him, but, in a bittersweet way, he reminded Taka of Mondo. It felt, in a way, like he had a piece of Mondo with him constantly, despite his passing.

He didn’t know exactly when it had happened, he had stopped keeping track of time by then, but Kiyondo pondered something that made Taka question himself: Why, exactly, was he so distraught over Mondo’s death?  
Kiyotaka claimed that it was simply because Mondo was his first, closest, and only friend. But Kiyondo strongly disagreed.  
Why he disagreed was quite simple — he already knew the answer to why the host was so distraught. He was shocked that Kiyotaka didn’t know it himself.

He had been falling in love.

Naturally, Kiyotaka had no defense against that, because, as it came to his attention, he began to allow himself to feel what he’d been repressing.  
He had been falling for Mondo. He had been attracted for the man for a while, and getting to know him only made the feelings stronger.  
However, he was scared. Scared his emotions would end up ruining his first and only friendship.  
But his emotions didn’t have to ruin the friendship — the damned killing game did it for him.

That’s when Kiyotaka got a brilliant, yet awful, idea. An idea that would’ve made him sick just to think about only a few days prior.  
He needed to see Mondo again. He needed to be with him, to tell him how he truly felt, to be around him again.  
And if he wanted that, he’d have to kill.  
The more he thought about what he could do, the more grin on his face slowly spread. He was perfect at everything, he'd always had to be, so he'd be able to pull it off perfectly. The best case scenario would see him getting caught, and then he could be at Mondo's side again, and in the worst, he got free and everyone else had to pay for taking Mondo away from him.

The fact that the worst case scenario was surviving made Kiyotaka almost cheerful. They would think they were punishing him. They'd think he would regret his actions once faced with death. But he was more than ready to welcome it, and his classmates were none the wiser.

Kiyotaka had made the decision that he’d take out Celeste. He’d poison her tea when nobody was looking and pin the blame on Hifumi.  
Kiyondo urged him to go bigger.  
"Mondo's trial was so messy because of Togami's interference," Kiyondo had reminded him. "What if he tries the same thing with you? Beat him to it. Give him a show."  
With his gears now turning, Kiyotaka made his plans bigger. He'd give his classmates, give the damn bear, give the mastermind a show. He'd give them a challenge. And if he was lucky, it would work out the way he'd planned.


	3. The Needlessly Meticulous Double Murder at Hope's Peak and the Trial Following

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> longer chapter we die like men

Just about every morning, near the end of breakfast, Hifumi Yamada would make and deliver tea to Celestia Ludenberg. Kiyotaka had already been planning to take advantage of such a thing, but his new plans could exploit it even better.  
He avoided breakfast, as he'd been doing since Mondo's execution, and walked inside the kitchen, getting himself some water. Taka sipped it, watching and waiting. As if he'd gotten some sort of cue, Hifumi entered the kitchen and began the process of making Celeste's tea. The dedication he showed was almost amusing to Kiyotaka, but he stayed silent and emotionless.  
When Hifumi turned away to find a teabag, Kiyotaka emptied the vial he'd retrieved from the nurse's office the night before into the cup, and quickly moved away once the contents were distributed.  
Hifumi noticed that his classmate had moved, and simply raised a brow, but didn't say anything. He didn't expect much from Taka, not while he was so weak.  
He finished up making the tea and left the kitchen, and after a bit of extra preparation, Kiyotaka followed. He made sure to be quiet on his feet, to not let the glass of water he carried make too much noise. He held the door open a slight amount, and kept silent, as usual, waiting. A while passed, and there was a thud, followed by audible panic from Hifumi. He kept saying her name, kept repeating her name, but there was no response. Perfect. Positively perfect.

"Hifumi?" Kiyotaka asked, walking into the room, false concern on his face. His voice was raspy, due to his sobbing and prolonged silence, but he tried to set that aside. "I heard some commotion, is everything okay?"  
Hifumi froze, looking up at him. His expression was akin to that of a deer in headlights; fear and confusion clearly filled him, and his whole body had a tremor running through it.  
"She- I- She just collapsed," he croaked. He sounded almost like he could cry. "I gave her some tea, and I waited to make sure I'd done it right, and she just collapsed!"  
Kiyotaka took a few steps forward, frowning. He examined Celeste, as if he was unknowing. He shook his head slowly, turning to Hifumi and holding out his arm, offering the glass of water in his hand.  
"Have some of my water," he said, his voice gentle. "It'll help you calm down."  
"Thank you," Hifumi said, not even taking a second to consider that the water might have been tampered with.  
He gulped down the water. Then, as soon as Celeste had, Hifumi came crashing down. Kiyotaka couldn't help but smile.

Carefully, Kiyotaka wrote out a note from the perspective of Hifumi, explaining that he had killed Celeste, but didn't fully process what he'd signed up for, and had ended his life because he couldn't handle the consequences of his actions. Nobody would doubt that.  
After he folded the paper, making sure it wouldn't be lopsided, he hurried from the room. He faked panic, rushing to find whoever he could.  
The first person he came across was Makoto, a little ways away from the dorms, which came as no shock. Makoto was always in the right place at the right time, as far as Kiyotaka was concerned.

"Taka? Is everything okay?" Makoto frowned, some worry building on his face when Kiyotaka approached him.  
"I heard- I heard some noises from Celestia's room," Kiyotaka said, his voice breaking. "The door wouldn't open, and I'm very concerned."  
Makoto looked a little worried, but followed without question. When they arrived, the door was open, and Makoto gasped at the scene before him, stunned. "What..... What happened here?"  
Kiyotaka simply shrugged, keeping the mask of worry on his face. He didn't want to say any more than he already had. It could very well be his downfall.  
Makoto took a few steps forward. He seemed to be trembling.  
"Go see if you can find someone else," Makoto said, turning toward Kiyotaka.  
Taka nodded, turning back toward the hall and setting off to find someone else. Then came Byakuya, with Genocide Jack in tow. Kiyotaka was starting to wonder if he was the Ultimate Lucky Student rather than Makoto.  
"What's going on here?" Byakuya demanded, glaring daggers. Genocide Jack peeked around him to see inside the room, though she didn't move from where she stood behind him.  
"Celeste and Hifumi," Kiyotaka said, expression grim.  
"Oooo, another murder?" Genocide Jack cooed, brows raising. She leaned a little closer to Byakuya, and he quickly stepped away from her.  
With a look of disgust on Byakuya's face, he walked into Celeste's room to examine what had happened. Kiyotaka followed him, and when entering the room, heard the far too familiar body discovery announcement. Taka could barely hear it over his thoughts and the sound of Kiyondo's praise. Everything was going according to plan.

Kiyotaka didn't need to help with the investigation. As usual, once Kyoko and Makoto were on it, the pieces of evidence were all discovered. Kyoko probably - no, definitely knew more than she was letting on, so Kiyotaka made sure to keep a close eye on her. The investigation seemed to drag on for far too long. It took all of his patience to not tell them that they'd searched enough, that they had everything they were looking for, and that they could move on to the trial. Eventually, by the will of god, or maybe just Monokuma, the class was alerted to go to the elevator.  
Once everyone was in position, and Monokuma gave a brief description of how the trial would work, their discussion began.

"Let's start with what we know," Makoto prompted. "Hifumi and Celeste died in Celeste's room shortly after breakfast, right?"  
"Correct," Sakura replied. "The Monokuma File states that they died after ingesting poison."  
"That would explain the cups we found," Aoi said thoughtfully. "But how did they get poisoned? Did they make a suicide pact or something?"  
"I don't think they would do that," Kiyotaka replied, shaking his head a bit. "It's more likely Hifumi killed Celeste... And perhaps killed himself out of guilt."  
"That would make sense," Byakuya agreed, though his voice was just as condescending as usual. "Hifumi is certainly the type to crack under pressure like that."  
"He's a soft guy, you know?" Hiro mused. "It's no shock the guilt broke him."  
"That would explain the note by his body," Aoi frowned.  
Genocide Jack groaned, rolling her eyes. "I mean, duh, that makes sense, but that's so boring."  
Makoto seemed deep in thought, and Kiyotaka had to fight down the urge to roll his eyes.  
"There's one problem with it being a murder suicide," Makoto finally mentioned. "Hifumi didn't have any reason to kill Celeste."  
Kyoko nodded. "He's shown no desire to kill, even if it meant getting out."  
"Well, let's talk about alibis," Hiro suggested. "Maybe someone's seen something today."  
"How about you, Kiyotaka?" Makoto asked. "You found the bodies. Do you have any idea what might have happened?"

Kiyotaka took a breath, before speaking. "This morning, I was in the kitchen getting a drink. I saw Hifumi making tea, which I assumed was for Celeste. I turned my back for a moment, and by the time I was facing him again, he had left. I left maybe five or ten minutes after him to retire in my room. I heard a scream, so naturally I was worried, but I couldn't open the door. That was when I went to find the others."  
Then, the others began to go through their own alibis. Kiyotaka didn't care much, seeing as the alibis of others didn't pertain to what he was trying to achieve.  
Eventually, Aoi let out a frustrated sigh. "Hifumi's the only option."  
"Not necessarily," Kyoko said suddenly.  
"What do you mean by that?" Sakura questioned, her brows furrowing.  
"There was something peculiar about the note Hifumi left behind," Kyoko noted, her voice matter-of-fact as usual. "You know, don't you, Makoto?"  
Makoto thought for a moment, before speaking. "The note was perfectly folded, wasn't it? Now that I think about it, that is really strange."  
"What? Why's it strange?" Genocide Jack asked, scowling a bit. "I don't get it."  
"Think about how Hifumi must have been when Celeste died," Makoto prompted. "If he killed her, and was hit by guilt, he would be overwhelmed, wouldn't he?"  
"Because of his shock, he would have most definitely been shaking," Kyoko agreed.  
"However, as Makoto said, the note was perfect," Byakuya chimed in, tone still dripping with arrogance. "Hifumi couldn't have written it so neatly, nor folded it in such a way."  
"So...." Aoi frowned deeply. "Who could have?"  
Makoto had a certain look on his face, which made Byakuya laugh. "You know. Tell them, Makoto."  
"Kiyotaka could have done it like that," Makoto declared.  
If he were to be fully honest, Kiyotaka was surprised. Making sure the paper was perfect was like second nature to him - could it perhaps be his downfall?  
"So what if it was folded perfectly?" Taka asked, his voice almost bemused. "Any self respecting student can fold a paper correctly."  
Kyoko frowned a bit. "Consider Kiyotaka's alibi, Makoto. How did he say he discovered the bodies?"  
"He said...." Makoto trailed off, before realization struck him. "He said that he heard Hifumi scream, right? But that wouldn't have been possible. The dorms are soundproof."  
Kiyotaka remained silent after Makoto spoke. That had been an oversight on his part, he'd forgotten it when he'd made his plan. It mattered not, however. No matter what happened, he would succeed.  
"Y'know...." Yasuhiro began, his brows knitted together and a frown on his face. "....Taka's had a real strange aura lately."  
Suddenly, the man in question began to laugh. His laugh seemed different as opposed to how it normally was, and it cast silence across the courtroom. Kiyotaka fell backward mid laugh, and when he rose, he was much different.

Everyone stared in shock at him. His hair was suddenly blonde, his eyes burning, and his stance aggressively tense. Despite the expectant stares, however, he kept his mouth shut.  
"Uhm…" Makoto frowned, a mixture of awkwardness and nervousness within him. "What kind of weird, Hiro?"  
"Well, y'know, he just seemed kinda off recently," Hiro shrugged. "Like, ever since Mondo died, he-"  
"You ain't got the right to say his name, dumbbutt!"  
Another shocked silence fell across the room. Kiyotaka had spoken... but he wasn't Kiyotaka anymore.  
"Taka?" Aoi squeaked. "What... happened?"  
"I'm not Taka, damnit!" He shouted. "Listen up, and listen good. My name is Kiyondo Ishida. I am the mix of Mondo and Taka, brought about after Mondo's death. And, honestly, this trial's gettin' boring! I'm sick of listening to you all!"  
Sakura spoke when he'd paused. "Okay... Kiyondo. Could you please explain what happened?"  
"We knew we were going to die soon anyways, but why wait until someone killed us first?" Kiyondo proposed. "Kiyotaka was already starving himself - I'm not sure if you all even noticed - so we were going to die anyways. But this is a hell of a lot more interesting, isn't it?"  
The silence in the room was heavy.  
When nobody else spoke, Kiyondo picked back up again. "Think of it this way. Kiyotaka's soul will be with Mondo soon. Isn't that wonderful?" Slowly, he shook his head. "We made this case so simple, it's friggin' disappointing how long it took you."

Soon enough, it was Makoto's time to piece together the order of events. It was quite simple, since Kiyondo had confessed, but he didn't seem to mind. He voted for himself when everyone else voted, and waited to be taken away, embracing his inevitable death with open arms. Soon enough, a chain was around his neck. He flashed the other students a cold smile, before getting yanked back quickly. He would be with Mondo soon, and that's all that mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> no swearing in my christian minecraft server >:(


	4. Prime Minister Kiyotaka Ishimaru’s Inaugural Parade

Kiyondo had forced Kiyotaka into front just in time for the execution.  
Back to his normal self, and barely remembering what had led up to the moment he was in, Taka sat in a vehicle, trapped in his seat. His arm was strapped to a mechanism that kept it steadily moving, steadily waving.  
As the car he was in drove forward, it connected in his brain just what was happening.  
He had been gifted, rather than earned, the mocking title of prime minister, and this was his parade.  
Monokumas cheered around him, holding up signs with great enthusiasm, and Kiyotaka got the chance to fully process how much of a spit in the face this all was. However he was going to die... it would be proceeded by a mockery of everything he stood for.

It would have given him a great deal of despair if he hadn’t known that he would soon be with Mondo.  
With a blank expression and an annoyingly frenzied mind, Kiyotaka sat in the seat of the car, waiting for the end. Unlike the others before him, he didn’t show fear, and he didn’t try to fight the inevitable. He simply remained chillingly calm.

Were the others who remained alive upset that he was being driven to his death? Would any miss him, would any cry for him? Or would they instead rejoice once he was finally gone, and celebrate the thought that he’d be out of their hair once and for all?  
Would the spirits of the others welcome him, or would they reject him? What really did come after death - what if it wasn’t what he expected?

Kiyotaka was almost thankful when he heard a gunshot, but kept his face flat as the bullet struck him. Soon, his thoughts were silenced, his eyes shut, and his last breath was exhaled.  
His hand kept waving as the car moved out of sight.

A nagging pain remained in his chest, and didn’t seem to want to go away. Kiyotaka’s eyes stayed sealed shut, but they opened at the sound of a familiar voice. One he hadn’t heard in far, far too long.  
“Bro? Is that really you?”  
A smile graced Taka’s face despite the horrible pain. Any ounce of despair he may have had left him. He was safe now.  
“Yeah, bro,” Taka said softly, his smile growing wider. “It’s really me.”


End file.
